Thursday, December 8, 2011

Talking to a Student on his Use of Sexual Vocabulary

Ok so, you may have read that there is a (3rd grade) student in my class who has been prematurely exposed to certain shows and videogames. Well, he's showing it off more in his vocabulary and his actions. For example, he use to play "Naruto" with his friends, but they would actually attempt to make contact. In the past, he would pretend to charge at one of his friends and thrust his palm at their stomach. I shut that down. He was pretty obedient in listening to my request to not play fight (which is already pretty close to real fighting).

He's also been escalating his use of sexual vocabulary (e.g. penis, anus, pussy, vagina, boobs, and there's probably more, but I can't remember it all...). That is, he'll make jokes involving sexual vocabulary. I assume that it's because the shows he watches make jokes using sexual vocabulary (i.e. Southpark and Family Guy).

Today, during a read aloud, I tried to catch him off guard. Right in the middle of when he was following along with Mr. Agajan, I whispered to him, "Hey... Can I talk to you for a sec?" I think he really didn't expect me to pull him aside during read aloud. I had to ask him two or three times before he came with me. "Student X... I need to talk with you right now. Come with me." Finally, he follows me outside. Right as soon as we step outside the door, he starts asking questions. "Where are we going? Did I do something wrong?" To that, I replied, "Relax. We're just going around the corner." We each sat in a chair in front of the entrance to the office. There wasn't much foot traffic since our talk was during the middle of everyone else's class time.

This is basically what I said: "So, Student X, you've been using some language which is inappropriate. And, I'm pretty sure that you're getting it from the TV shows that you watch." He smirked a little and nodded. "Well, Student X, I need you to not use that vocabulary at school. I'll tell you why. I know that when you use that vocabulary, you're joking around. Also, I know that your friends usually know that you're joking. But, other people that hear that vocabulary might get offended. And, you don't know who you will bother or offend by using that vocabulary. Whoever hears you use that vocabulary might tell their parents. Then, their parents will want to talk to your parents. And then, you'll get in trouble with your parents. Do you understand?" He looked at me more seriously and nodded. "Ok so, don't use that vocabulary at school anymore, ok?" He says  "Ok." As we're walking back to class, he asks, "Are you gonna tell my parents?" I reply, "If you don't use that vocabulary anymore, then I won't tell your parents." The implication is that if he uses any sexual vocabulary again, then I must tell his parents.

I'm on pretty good terms with this student. He likes me a lot. So, I expect that he will listen to my request. Unfortunately, like many students, in a particular respect, he is kind of like a little scientist. That is, he likes to test limits. I said that I don't want him to use sexual vocabulary anymore. I didn't say anything about not acting out sexual vocabulary. So, during math, he is solving problem with coins. He starts holding a quarter over his shirt with each of his index fingers, one on each his right and left nipples, and starts dancing in front of me. In retrospect, I took that as a direct challenge to me. Immediately, I told him to stop fooling around and get back to the math problems at hand. We'll see how long it takes until I need to talk with him.

By the way, one final note. I wish that when I talked with him, I emphasized that if his friends start copying him and using the same sexual vocabulary at home, their parents might also talk to his parents. Anyway, we'll have to see if any further intervention is required. For some reason, I'm expecting that this isn't over yet. We'll see how much more I need to do, if anything. It all depends on how he will behave in the future with respect to this issue.

No comments:

Post a Comment